Happy Holidays everyone!!!
May all your dreams come true!!!
Dec 23, 2011
Nov 16, 2011
I can do all things by the grace of God who strengthens me.
There have been too many challenges I have been facing lately. From the start of this year, until today, as the year gears towards its end. I seem not to run out of these challenges.
At work, the year was greeted with so much controversies of the year that was. A case brew with my office mates that ended up with formal investigations and show cause orders. 11 months and several affidavits thereafter,the result of the case is still unclear.
At the time that these things were happening, a suit was filed for damages against me and 7 others. Case is at the court of appeals pending decision after an MOR was filed against its outright dismissal.
This year I also got pregnant and my health was tested to its limits.
Hypertension challenged this pregnancy aside from myoma and recurring UTI.
I am blessed to have delivered a healthy baby. Blood pressure has normalized and myoma uteri have also shrinked. Today, I am back to work with a 3 month old baby to whom i leave to the care of a baby sitter
Leaving the care to another person, especially if not a relative is a challenge if it doesn't push one's patience to the limits. This is why I keep praying for God's grace to give me more patience as it is fastly wearing thin.
I just try to be grateful that someone is looking after my child.
I also also find balancing my career and household management a challenge. Those who are in my shoes would agree with me on this. Its either you organize your house and everything in it in the morning or be late for work.
My children's health were also challenged just recently for respiratory infections. It was a nightmare. But I am thankful that this is behind us.
My son also has been tardy for his class. I am worried that the school would send a memo for us because of his increasing number of tardiness in school. His punctuality has been sacrificed since I went back to work. I am also not sure if he is fed well before he leaves the house. There are numerous reasons to be late but there are also numerous ways to avoid being late. My heart breaks because of this. There should be no excuse for him to be late for work . It could not be his fault that he is late. It is the fault of the one bringing him to school. I also worry of the effect that this have on him if he is habitually tardy. He might later learn that it is just ok to be late and not value the time of others. I wish he would be more punctual. I wish there aren't excuses for him not to be so.
If only I could divide myself in two. If only half of my body could come to work and half of it be at home to care for the needs of my baby and my pre schooler.
There are things that need to be improved and I wish that I have more time for my son. To be there for him and prepare him for school, cook his baon and all.
But there is just so much that I can do. I wish I could do more.
With God's grace, I can do more.
I pray for God's continious grace as he sees me through all these challenges. I entrust to him everything that I have. Just as how he has carried me through the delivery of trina, i trust that he will carry me through all these. For He is my strength.
There have been too many challenges I have been facing lately. From the start of this year, until today, as the year gears towards its end. I seem not to run out of these challenges.
At work, the year was greeted with so much controversies of the year that was. A case brew with my office mates that ended up with formal investigations and show cause orders. 11 months and several affidavits thereafter,the result of the case is still unclear.
At the time that these things were happening, a suit was filed for damages against me and 7 others. Case is at the court of appeals pending decision after an MOR was filed against its outright dismissal.
This year I also got pregnant and my health was tested to its limits.
Hypertension challenged this pregnancy aside from myoma and recurring UTI.
I am blessed to have delivered a healthy baby. Blood pressure has normalized and myoma uteri have also shrinked. Today, I am back to work with a 3 month old baby to whom i leave to the care of a baby sitter
Leaving the care to another person, especially if not a relative is a challenge if it doesn't push one's patience to the limits. This is why I keep praying for God's grace to give me more patience as it is fastly wearing thin.
I just try to be grateful that someone is looking after my child.
I also also find balancing my career and household management a challenge. Those who are in my shoes would agree with me on this. Its either you organize your house and everything in it in the morning or be late for work.
My children's health were also challenged just recently for respiratory infections. It was a nightmare. But I am thankful that this is behind us.
My son also has been tardy for his class. I am worried that the school would send a memo for us because of his increasing number of tardiness in school. His punctuality has been sacrificed since I went back to work. I am also not sure if he is fed well before he leaves the house. There are numerous reasons to be late but there are also numerous ways to avoid being late. My heart breaks because of this. There should be no excuse for him to be late for work . It could not be his fault that he is late. It is the fault of the one bringing him to school. I also worry of the effect that this have on him if he is habitually tardy. He might later learn that it is just ok to be late and not value the time of others. I wish he would be more punctual. I wish there aren't excuses for him not to be so.
If only I could divide myself in two. If only half of my body could come to work and half of it be at home to care for the needs of my baby and my pre schooler.
There are things that need to be improved and I wish that I have more time for my son. To be there for him and prepare him for school, cook his baon and all.
But there is just so much that I can do. I wish I could do more.
With God's grace, I can do more.
I pray for God's continious grace as he sees me through all these challenges. I entrust to him everything that I have. Just as how he has carried me through the delivery of trina, i trust that he will carry me through all these. For He is my strength.
Oct 28, 2011
a year gone by
It's more than a year since my last post here.
So much has happened and so much has changed yet so much remain quite the same.
I'm still working in this office,
I still want to practice free lance,
15 months from my previous post, I am now a mother of two! Yes, my bouncing baby girl came to this world via CS on August 10, 2011.
And life is never sweeter. Despite the complications both both pregnancy and delivery, Life is beautiful.
Sure, Im again into my second bout of sleepless nights, I am again late for work because I just can't leave the house. I want hold my baby in arms so much.Middle of the night feedings, early morning waking with only an hour of sleep. It was five years ago when I went through this cycle with my first child. I am amazed now as i look at him how fast time flew. I could still vividly remember how I cuddled him and rocked him to sleep each night until he turned one. Now, he is five and i wonder where time went, he is now in school.
Bryan, my baby turned five yesterday.
Now, with my second baby, I am again trying to survive motherhood and my day job. But today, things are far more different in the workplace. I am more understood by the big boss, I am not compelled to travel and leave my newborn. I am more relaxed in the office but my mind is still with my baby. I am barely 2 weeks out of my maternity leave and anxiety is so much that I just want to run home and hold my baby.
So much have changed yet things are just the same!!!
Welcome to my life, darling Trina! Mommy can't get you out of her mind! I love yo dearly.
So much has happened and so much has changed yet so much remain quite the same.
I'm still working in this office,
I still want to practice free lance,
15 months from my previous post, I am now a mother of two! Yes, my bouncing baby girl came to this world via CS on August 10, 2011.
And life is never sweeter. Despite the complications both both pregnancy and delivery, Life is beautiful.
Sure, Im again into my second bout of sleepless nights, I am again late for work because I just can't leave the house. I want hold my baby in arms so much.Middle of the night feedings, early morning waking with only an hour of sleep. It was five years ago when I went through this cycle with my first child. I am amazed now as i look at him how fast time flew. I could still vividly remember how I cuddled him and rocked him to sleep each night until he turned one. Now, he is five and i wonder where time went, he is now in school.
Bryan, my baby turned five yesterday.
Now, with my second baby, I am again trying to survive motherhood and my day job. But today, things are far more different in the workplace. I am more understood by the big boss, I am not compelled to travel and leave my newborn. I am more relaxed in the office but my mind is still with my baby. I am barely 2 weeks out of my maternity leave and anxiety is so much that I just want to run home and hold my baby.
So much have changed yet things are just the same!!!
Welcome to my life, darling Trina! Mommy can't get you out of her mind! I love yo dearly.
Jun 7, 2010
... its how you recover when things fail that counts..
I posted this in Facebook just today.
It is a gist of two life changing events that were supposed to happen but did not.
Two things failed.
First is my application to be an instructor in my Alma Mater did not materialize. I was assured by the Dept Head but suddenly things started to turn against me.
I tendered my resignation with high hopes of a better future not just for me but for my son, and maybe kids to come...
Which leads to the second yet more painful downfall.My failure to conceive. We have been on this fertility work up, though we were on our first cycle, I have kept my hopes high, because we have prayed and prayed so hard for another bundle of joy yet this seem to be something out of our reach.
I could not yet fathom God's plan but all I can do now is keep still and let God be in control.
It has been a struggle for me to come to work everyday. Not because I didn't want to come to work but because of domestic reasons. It's one of the many reasons that I just want to be home with my son. But none of it is going the way I planned.
I guess my plans are not in consonance with God's plan. And maybe even if it is, it is not the proper time. I succumb to God's greatness and power over all that is around me.
You O Lord know everything and will always be in control of my life. To you I give back all the honor and glory.
It is a gist of two life changing events that were supposed to happen but did not.
Two things failed.
First is my application to be an instructor in my Alma Mater did not materialize. I was assured by the Dept Head but suddenly things started to turn against me.
I tendered my resignation with high hopes of a better future not just for me but for my son, and maybe kids to come...
Which leads to the second yet more painful downfall.My failure to conceive. We have been on this fertility work up, though we were on our first cycle, I have kept my hopes high, because we have prayed and prayed so hard for another bundle of joy yet this seem to be something out of our reach.
I could not yet fathom God's plan but all I can do now is keep still and let God be in control.
It has been a struggle for me to come to work everyday. Not because I didn't want to come to work but because of domestic reasons. It's one of the many reasons that I just want to be home with my son. But none of it is going the way I planned.
I guess my plans are not in consonance with God's plan. And maybe even if it is, it is not the proper time. I succumb to God's greatness and power over all that is around me.
You O Lord know everything and will always be in control of my life. To you I give back all the honor and glory.
May 14, 2010
May 12, 2010
just today, i learned this: The weak cannot forgive, forgiveness is the attribute of the strong-Mahatma Gandhi
I know I have been keeping grudges in my heart. And for a long time, I have not been truly fair to all around me. I have been hard on others. Thinking that if they can hurt me, I can hurt them more. And this grudge became hatred. Hatred for a person I know I can't erase from my life. A person, which, because of my impetuous decisions, I can not pretend to not exist. And by this, things have become rough.
I developed hypertension due to stressors not only found in my workplace but also at home as well.
Everything is smooth now because the boy is away. And if he comes back for this school year, I want to have a change. I know that it is a difficult step but I also learned the distance doesn't matter, the most difficult thing to do is to take the first step!
So now I want to make the first step. And I hope all things will follow.
I know I have been keeping grudges in my heart. And for a long time, I have not been truly fair to all around me. I have been hard on others. Thinking that if they can hurt me, I can hurt them more. And this grudge became hatred. Hatred for a person I know I can't erase from my life. A person, which, because of my impetuous decisions, I can not pretend to not exist. And by this, things have become rough.
I developed hypertension due to stressors not only found in my workplace but also at home as well.
Everything is smooth now because the boy is away. And if he comes back for this school year, I want to have a change. I know that it is a difficult step but I also learned the distance doesn't matter, the most difficult thing to do is to take the first step!
So now I want to make the first step. And I hope all things will follow.
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