God is In Control

These past few months, my husband and I have been struggling to find a helper that will look after our baby.

Since April of this year, our yaya's come and go some lasting for only three weeks at the most.

The worst encounter we had was this week. A helper arrived early monday morning and stayed with my baby through the day. My mother-in-law was there to supervise her.

I arrived later that day and met her, had a little talk with her with my rules around the house. I wasted no time to orient her on the do's and don'ts in my household. She appeared to be perceptive and followed my every instruction. I also observed that she was smiling and paid attention to everything that I was telling her. I made it clear to her to limit the use of her cellphone when she is at work for obvious reasons.She continued to smile and said yes to all my instructions. So far, so good.

She presented herself as an 18 year old girl that had an experience in taking care of a special child that lasted 2 months. I welcomed her to my household just like any other helper.

I observed that she was poorly groomed and emitted a despicable odor. Politely, I gave her an unused bath soap and bottle of an unused shampoo hoping that she would take a hint and take a bath.

But for Christ's sake, she accepted her bath paraphernalia but told me she will do her grooming tomorrow. Ok. No arguments there.

After her day's work I told her she could already retire and take an early rest. I gave her her beddings, etc... the usual stuff and told her to wake up at 5am to cook breakfast and baon for my son who was going to school. All answer I got from her was in the affirmative.

Morning came, alarm greeted me and I rose up because I didnt feel her get up. I thought she might have dozed off heavily and was not aware that it was her wake up call.

I knocked on her room 3 times, no answer. I opened her door but she was not in her room. I noticed the window was widely opened. I checked her belongings, they were nowhere to be found either.

I was shocked, could she have possibly escaped the night before through the window? The answer would be yes.

By this time, i was in  panic. I immediately woke my husband to let him know what happened.

He immediately checked the front door and found that it was unlocked but the perpetrator was not successful in pulling it open. Thank you for the rainy season, door jambs have been tight and would require mighty effort to open doors.

We were in quite a shock.  So many what ifs entered my mind. what if somebody tried to enter the house through the window she had left so widely opened? What if she took some of our valuable belongings like the laptop, cellphones that were just lying everywhere our small abode. What if she let somebody in and harmed us... i could go on.

After some investigation, I found out she took 70 pesos from my son's wallet. Enough for fare.

I thank God that it was all she took.  She was just desperate to leave our house for reasons I will never know.

We wasted no time report the incident to the community police station.

This gave me a fright. I could no longer bring myself to seek for a helper after that.

My mother in law volunteered to look after my baby girl. And I immediately knew,
God is in control. He let all of this happen for me to know that the solution to my problem has been there all along. I was just refusing to accept it.

My mother in law said that we dont have to look for a helper.
That was where it all sunk in. God has allowed my mother in law to be with us to let us know that he has taken care of my worries.

I know that she is growing old but for her willingness to help us, I will forever be grateful.

God is truly in control.

gorgeous weekend!!!

I'm just thankful that Tony and I were able to get through the week without a helper. My mother in law, after arriving for Trina's birthday decided to stay with us for a while. She happily extended help as she knew, helpers do come and go. And it is becoming harder and harder for us to find a decent helper.

 Unfortunately however, she was taken ill just a few days after she arrived.

She was diagnosed with pneumonia and on  her follow up, her x-ray showed minimal pulmonary tuberculosis.

This weakened her and spends more time in bed than ever before. So now, we have to have a helper to not only watch our baby, but also to keep company over our aging beloved mother.

I think that it is a blessing that she came and stayed because if not, I doubt that she would be provided the best medical care possible. Her 80 year old frame is now taking its toll and i believe she is with us for a reason.

My only prayer is that her PTB is inactive so she won't infect trina, whom she is always in close contact with.

She is old but still volunteers to look after my 12 month old who is at a stage where she explores and moves around and literally turns the house upside down. This quite amazes me. Had it not been for ailment, she could still cope with the demands of the baby.

This Saturday, i decided to take the kids for a visit to my moms place. We tagged Lola C along because it turned out to be a sunny but windy day a perfect day for a stroll.

Day was spent  mostly catching up with my mom and sis in law. Was happy to see them and get to spend time with them.

Mom in law appreciated being tagged along because she felt she belonged. Something that was void in her life for quite a while.

I'm happy to be making her feel that she belongs.

LOvely day! Perfect family. What more can I ask for?

has it really been a year?

Saturday, we celebrated my darling Trina's 1st birthday.

It was a simple party but with the essentials covered. I debated whether to push through with the celebration because of the weather.

Fortunately on that day, we had a decent weather. One that we didn't have for weeks before the occasion. I was ecstatic to wake up and saw that there was no pouring rain and the sun was about to shine! I was a beautiful day.

One that fits the birthday celebration of my beautiful daughter.

Family was complete as my mom-in-law was able to come all the way from Angeles to grace the occasion. So did my step son Myron. Philip and Family were there too.

 Bryan had to go to school so Tony had to fetch him from school. He was happy to come to the party and have time with his cousins and friends.
 
I had nothing more to ask except for my Darling one year old to be on top of her health, and grow up the normal life every parent would dream of their children.

Time flew so fast, i wonder where that 12 months went. I feels like it was only yesterday when I cuddled Trina in my arms and cradled her to sleep.

I am amazed at how this whirlwind of a time passes by like a flash of lightning.

It still feels like only yesterday that I had my first born and now he's 5 and a great big brother to his baby sister.

Life is a blast!!

Have a blessed year ahead my naneng!!!!

Villa Navarro, Caba, La Union

Been here before. This place really brought me back to that day in 2004.
Love the sunset!!!

some of the not so old stuff

HUWAW!!

Looks like the heavens have been reading my blogs!! I hope not! They might not find my rantings pleasing!!! However, as i have just posted the other day, I would be having the chance to meet up with old friends. My former colleagues from TESDA. Wow, its really been a while since I last saw them. I left the Authority about 4 years ago, and just about the same time I last saw any of them. Well if jing has not come home from Dubai, maybe we wouldn't be even meeting up tomorrow. Thanks for homecomings and balikbayans! I'm so looking forward to meeting my good ol pals tomorrow! Hope the weather cooperates.

And hope my son gets better..Just brought him to his pedia today.. He had been having bad tummy for 2 days now and I got so worried. Fortunately, his lab test came out negative for any infections or virus.

I only have to concentrate now on rehydrating him so that lost minerals are replaced.

I have been wondering why this happened. I mean, i dont give him street food. Every meal given to my son is prepared and cooked at home. But despite this, he had bad tummy ache and LBM.. eeew.. ssorry..

It just occured to me that it might have something to do with the inefficient waste management of our City. As we all know, it has been raining for a week now and garbage is stocked here and there and every where in the City. It might have contaminated the water supply. I have stopped boiling my son's water since he turned two because i am confident that the water we dring is safe. We do buy purified drinking water.

My pedia happened to have told me that there have been a multiplying number of gastro entirities and amoebaiasis cases in children this week alone. And I belieive that it all boils down to how the City has been managing our garbages over the past few months.

I am Baguio grown, and I am so disheartned to see now that the City I grew up in and the City that I most love is now being stripped of its old glamour right before my eyes. Blame it on the City Governemnt. They should do something about this. Lest an epidemic might break out!!! Yipes!!!

Kung may usong sakit ngaun.. ayoko nang makiuso... Sa inyo nalang salamat!!

Word of the wise: Even if you buy purified water, boil your drinking water at least five minutes. We don't really know if our water has been contaminated by these loose garbage everywhere.. But why take chances? 5 minutes of boiling or a lifetime of amoeba in your system.

I witness God's Goodness for I am instrument of His

Every saturday, a lady, who is also my neighbor comes to the house at exactly 8 am to sell me fresh lowland vegetables.

According to her, she is a mother of 6 children, her youngest being only 4years old.
She sells vegetables around the neighborhood in the morning and sells her merchandise by 11am.

She goes home, cooks lunch for her family and rests.
In the afternoon, she cooks some banana q, camoteq or any kind of miryenda, and sells around the neighborhood again.

This is her daily routine.

Amazing how this mother works to feed her family

Her husband, according to her is a laborer and job comes seasonally.

I buy from her to save me from going to the market.
One day she told me that I am always "buena mano " to her on Saturdays.
And claims that I'm a lucky buena mano because she is able to sell all her vegetables on Saturdays.

On other days, she says, sometimes she brings home unsold gulay for her family's meal.

Last saturday, she told me her youngest child is down with typhoid fever.

Being an employee of social welfare, I immediately told her to get a medical certificate from the doctor and asked her to come to my office as soon as she can.

I referred her to the CIU (crisis intervention unit) of my agency so she could avail of financial assistance

True enough, she was able to get some medicinces for free, thanks to the City's help. And some amount of money for her other needs.

She got her check today.
I couldn't describe the happiness on her face when she recieved it.
She said, it was an early Christmas gift.

This touched my heart. She also called me a blessing to her family.
I didn't even realize such. But I give back all the glory to God.
I was also able to refer her to the livelihood unit.

She mentioned one day that she wanted to borrow a certain amount of capital so that she can sell some meat and fish that would go with the vegetables she sell. Which means, extra capital.

Today, before she left our office, she was interviewd by the one in-charge of the livelihood unit. She was given hope that she would be able to borrow the money so she could push through with her plans.

She was so happy. She actually called me an angel.

I told her I was only an instrument to the goodnes of God.

This brought me to a realization that sometimes,the simplest things we do go a long for others.

I was happy I was able to help.

Thank you Father for making me an instrument of your love.

I am amazed at how God has sustained me through this week. My unit has been unmanned since early July this year and I am practically performing double functions. Like wearing two hats for that matter. Despite of it all, I have managed to survive, with little difficulty here and there.

But this week, I can say is the toughest. As I prepare my report for the agency I work with, I also have deadlines to beat with this new client. And so I work my bones hard during my regular work hours, and have to stay up late at night to cope with my new client's demands. And I am not at all mazed. I am still alert during the day where I also have to manage and coach 2 subordinates.

The best part of it? No terrible migraine attacks and no blood pressure surges! So I am able to accomplish a good deal. I am also still able to put my son to sleep at night before I work in the evening. He sleeps late, which means, I can only start working at night when my son sleeps. I pray that this won't take its toll! I know it is God who has given me the strength to do all this, and I return to Him all the Glory.

Amazing really, how God works in my life. I shall not want!

hypertension

Not exactly a good day today. I woke up with a bad headache. My blood pressure is nowhere within its normal range. I battled getting up to prepare my self to work but couldn't much concentrate on things. Nonetheless, I managed accomplish some tasks. (arrggh!)

I hope this headache goes away right away!
I hate it when I get attacks of severe headache. I'm not really sure what's causing it. I only suspect that my blood pressure surged again.

I keep praying that this ailment would leave my body so I can go back to my normal self. I miss those days when I could stay up all night yet get up early and go to work on time and accomplish my job well. Those days are gone. Or am I getting old? At 31, I must admit I'm not getting any younger and things are not the way they used to be. But hey not that old! My husband is way older than I am but he's more agile and more fit, blood pressure stable and no ailment has conquered his body. Which I am much thankful for. Just a few back and shoulder pains here and there but not major ailments. Which I can readily fix with that tender loving massage. Praise God for his divine health!

Though I know I am not getting any younger but having to battle hypertension is beyond my imagination. I never imagined I would develop this kind of ailment. For one, I do not eat fatty foods. I also do away from those that are too oily and avoid salty junk foods. So what's causing this? I also do not have a family history of hypertension.

My father is as healthy as a cow and has never at any point experienced having a high blood pressure. I still wonder what I've don to acquire such illness. I've had tests to trace whether there are underlying diseases such as diabetes, kidney malfunction or hyperthyroidism. All of which showed negative results. In a way, I am thankful about it though. At least, I only have to deal with one.

But I'm getting tired of having to suffer severe shoulder, and neck pains and severe headaches.

I continue to pray for my complete healing.

FRIEND OR FOE?

I saw an old friend today as I went to SM to purchase milk for my Bryan. I did not know whether to approach her or not because for sure, I wouldn't know what to tell her. Our last conversation more than two years ago was not something you can call pleasant. And she owed me some bucks of which I was also reminded.

I don't know whether a friend would be the right term to describe my present relationship with her. As I look back, I recall her as a "barkada" who was fond of going out on gimmiks here and there whether she had money or not.

Our last conversation was actually something about me asking her to pay me back the money she owed. And as I recall, she was infuriated by my demands. Which actually surprised me. If my memory served me right, she's the one indebted to me.

And today when I saw her, clad in not so ordinary clothes, I figured, if she could dress that way, maybe she's able to pay her long overdue debt. But I didn't have the courage to confront her! (ano ba yan? ako na nga ang inutangan, ako pa ang nahiyang lumapit!)

I know that my God is just. And I leave it all up to Him.

After all, He will be the judge on the last day.

GOD'S WONDEROUS WAYS

God is a generous God! He knows everything that my heart longs for. Only He has plans we have no way of knowing. And His reasons for everythin, only He can understand.

I can see His hand once again working in my life. I know that it is Him who gave me every blessing and every oppurtunity that I have had.

I see Him now answering my prayers.

I hope all goes well.

Thank you, Dear God!!

THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!

birthday wish

My birthday is in two days.

I only have one wish..

And that is, to find another source of living before the year ends...
I am so eager to start up my own business but as of the moment, I could not
for lack of funds. I hope and pray that our plans do materialize by the end of this year...

Thank You, Lord for a Sunny Monday

I usually hate Mondays! For one, its the start of the week and I have to wake up early. I usually get hangovers of the previous weekend and I also have to leave my son so I can go to work. I have to explain to him that he has to stay with is ate so I can go to work. And almost all of the time, he would be left screaming crying in protest.

But today is a fairly different Monday. Unlike any other Mondays, today, I woke up early. It was also a sunny day which made it more pleasant. After a weeklong of continous heavy downpour, the sun finally showed up! This might have lifted my spirits. My Bryan also woke up just when I was about to go out the door. And unlike any other day, he just smiled and blew me a kiss, while he still lay sleepy in bed. And said "babay mam!". This might be the reason I left the house quite happy. I didn't have to leave my son heavy hearted on a Monday morning, where I usually run late!! Talk about manic monday!!!

I also arrived at the office a little over 10 minutes before 8:30.For the first time in 3 months, I got in just in time for the flag ceremony and monday program!

Although I see it as a challenging week ahead, I am happy for this fresh start.

Thank you Lord for your countless blessings, and for allowing me to start my week right!

Once again we left Bryan this morning crying on the top of his lungs... Calling out for his daddy to give him some more time to ride and take charge of the wheel. It has been his morning ritual. Each morning before we leave, he sits on his dads lap as they warm up the car. Yesterday and the day before that, he was not able to do so. It has been raining early in the morning so I don't allow him to go out of the house. We don't have a garage and the car is parked down the road. And this morning, he got lucky. The rain has stopped, but I was running late for work and he was reluctant to be left behind. And as we drove off, I could hear him yelling his lungs out for daddy. Wawa naman my baby. Don't worry Bryan, I will bring you along when I can ha?

haves and have nots

I have not..
... gone to work without kissing my darling Bryan and my hubby...
...slept for more than 4 straight hours at night since Bryan came to my life..
...bought a major wardrobe for myself in years...
...gone to work without thinking of my baby...
...been able to travel official in nature often because of family constraints...
...attended Sunday Mass in a long time (sorry Dear God, I pray that you forgive me for this)...
... saved money for my future. my present take home pay is just enough for my family's needs...
...been to the beach in years...
...settled my accounts with BIR...
...renewed my Accreditation as Tax Practitioner...

I have..
...often considered resigning from my present job...
...hypertension (I pray Lord God that you heal me from this ailment)...
...a wonderful family...
...no regrets in marrying my husband...
...searched and searched for new job opportunities...
...dreams of establishing a business to allow me more time to be with my son...
...a househelper who takes good care of my darling son...
...a home, warm enough to shelter me and my family...
...fear of what the future brings...
...a pending adminstrative case...